President Buhari: Two Years and Forty Thousand Email Addresses Later

with Reno Omokri

In two days’ time, the current Nigerian government would officially clock two years in the saddle. After two years as President of Nigeria, the only area in which President Muhammadu Buhari appears to have superseded his predecessor, former President Jonathan, is in the area of creating email addresses. Other than that, he is trailing Jonathan by every scale of measurement and in every Index of human development or economic growth.
And in case you are wondering what I mean by email addresses, let me bring you up to speed.
One of the President’s many media aides, a certain Bashir Ahmad, proudly revealed that one of President Muhammadu Buhari’s noteworthy achievements is the provision of “over 40,000 email addresses for government officials under the gov.ng and mil.ng domains”.
I am using his exact words to show you the type of people the President has surrounded himself with.
To crown it all, this media aide listed this ‘achievement’ under the hashtag #PMBTriumphsat2! You can thus see why many of us have said that this President is doomed to failure going by the characters around him.
Since Mr. Ahmad likes bandying about big numbers, perhaps he should also list the massacre of 347 Shiites men, women, children and infants in Zaria as another of his boss’ stellar achievement.
While he is at it, he should not forget the bombing of hundreds of Internally Displaced Persons and the doctors and other medical professionals who looked after them at Rann IDP camp in Borno State. Those would make for some very nice ‘triumph’ for #PMBTriumphsat2!
Now if this is a triumph, then what would you call Jonathan’s achievements at the 100-day mark of his administration?
Let me just list 20 key things that former President Jonathan was able to achieve in his first 100 days in office and I challenge the current administration to list what President Buhari has achieved in the last two years. If they are able to surpass what Jonathan achieved in 100 days, then I promise to convert and become a Buhari change agent.
By his first 100 days as President, Jonathan had achieved the following and much more:
1. Nigeria’s oil industry expanded by 20% and we reclaimed our position as Africa’s largest oil exporter which we’d hitherto lost to Angola. (Under President Buhari we have since lost the number one position to Angola again)

2. Recognised by OPEC in July 2011 as the second-largest oil exporter in the cartel, 2nd only to Saudi Arabia. It is the first time Nigeria recorded such a feat.

3. Inflation rate reduced to single digit. In June 2011, the Consumer Price Index showed an inflation rate of 10.2% which dropped to 9.4% in July, being the lowest rate in the last 4 years. (Under Buhari we are again at double digit inflation rate).

4. Foreign Reserves rose by 10% to $35 billion.

5. Nigeria’s GDP growth rate month over month grew from 6.7% in May to 6.9% in July of 2011.

6. Nigeria declared top three investment destinations in Africa (number 2) by the independent Africa Business Panel in the Netherlands.

7. Nigeria generated power at her highest level ever (4000mw) which was still far from enough but which would improve monthly.

8. Nigerian Railway Corporation commenced Mass Transit Services in 5 of 6 geo-political zones. Last zone would come on stream by year’s end.

9. Take off of the Nigerian Sovereign Investment Authority. With the establishment of the NSIA, the Jonathan administration planned to facilitate direct investments into infrastructure with priority areas being Power and Roads.

10. The Federal Government also awarded contracts for various road projects across the country, chief of which were the reconstruction of the Benin-Ore section of the Benin-Ore-Sagamu-Lagos road and the Kano-Maiduguri dualisation.

11. Launch of NigeriaSat-2 and NigeriaSat-X Satellites to expand Internet Bandwidth and provide early warning to prevent natural disasters.

12. President Jonathan introduced the policy of engaging the Private Sector on kerosene pricing, and price reduced between May and September, 2011.

13. In recognition of the sacrifices of youth corps members, President Jonathan approved the upward review of their allowances from 9,700 to 19,800 Naira.

14. Implementation of Minimum Wage Increase for Nigerian Workers to 18,000 Naira monthly.

15. Fulfillment of the promise of 35% Slot for Women in the cabinet.

16. Deepening Security and expanding Peace in the Niger Delta.

17. Reduced kidnapping in the South-east with the implementation of the President’s order to establish the 14 Brigade of the Nigerian Army in Ohafia, Abia state.

18. Ended piracy. Maritime Safety was ensured and stabilised .

19. A stellar cabinet comprising former MDs of the World Bank & Goldman Sachs, Chairperson Accenture and multiple PHds.

20. The National Automobile Council established an Automotive Development Fund to resuscitate the automobile industry and generate jobs.

21. Approval for genuine foreign investors to obtain visas at the port of entry to facilitate FDI investments.

22. Model Skills Training Centers set up in Abuja – collaboration between Industrial Training Fund & the Institute for Technical Education, Singapore.

23. Establishment of the Nigerian Vehicle Credit Purchase scheme.

24. Fought corruption at source with the introduction of IPPIS technology that eventually eliminated 50,000 ghost workers on the Federal Government payroll.

Let me add that though thousands of email accounts were opened for government and military officials by the Jonathan administration during its first 100 days, it will be pedestrian of me or anyone connected to that administration to list such a mundane accomplishment as an ‘achievement’. Let us leave that achievement for the Buhari administration.
Let us even go deeper. President Buhari and the All Progressives Congress called former President Goodluck Jonathan, who gave Nigerians YouWIN and SURE-P, and the Presidential Special Scholarship For Innovation And Development, clueless. So what do we then call the APC administration that gives Nigerians wheelbarrow?
They said Jonathan was tribalistic, yet his National Security Adviser, Chief of Defence Staff, Inspector General of Police, Chief of Naval Staff, Controller General of Prisons, Controller General of Customs and minister of defence were from the North. So what do we then say of President Muhammadu Buhari whose DG DSS is from his own hometown and whose Minister of Defence, Chief of Army Staff, Chief of Air Staff, NSA, IGP, CGP, CGI, CGP are all from his Northern Region? You see, no matter how far falsehood has travelled, it must eventually be overtaken by the truth!
In two years of Nigeria under President Buhari, the price of everything in Nigeria has gone up. In fact, the only thing that is cheaper in Nigeria today than it was in 2015 is the value of President Muhammadu Buhari’s campaign promises!
Even after he left office, Goodluck Jonathan was and is still keeping his campaign promises. He promised Abuja-Kaduna rail and finished it for Buhari to inaugurate. He promised that his ambition is not worth the blood of any Nigerian and is keeping to that even today. But even while he is in office, Buhari cannot keep his promises. If you doubt me, then show me your job seekers’ allowance or your President that belongs to no one, yet gave all the sensitive military and security jobs to his fellow Northerners!
Can you imagine what President Buhari and the APC would have said and done if Jonathan had divided Nigeria between those that voted for him and those that did not? Yet, that is precisely what President Buhari is doing!
I still find it hard to understand what could have possessed President Buhari to have said, “The constituents, for example, gave me 97% [of the vote] cannot in all honesty be treated on some issues with constituencies that gave me 5%.”
You see, the President has been too busy dividing Nigeria between 97% and 5% that he has not had time to focus on the economy and of course the economy has decided to join the unloved and unwanted 5%.
For the fifth consecutive quarter, the Nigerian economy shrank instead of growing. Our GDP shrank by 0.52%. The sad thing is that the government seems to be celebrating the fact that the most recent contraction of the economy is not as bad as the contraction of the last quarter.
Do you see the type of government we have? A government that compares which of their negative growths is better? Yet these people opened and still open their mouths to call a Jonathan under whom Nigeria became the third fastest-growing economy in the world (according to CNNMoney) ‘clueless’.
Jonathan’s cluelessness is 100 times better than Buhari’s clue-fullness and you do not need 40,000 email addresses to see this fact clearly!
And the silly season in Buhari’s administration just continues. Their stories are just too silly. The other day, we read that an administration official said President Muhammadu Buhari is taking made-in-Nigeria medicines in his London clinic. Almost a week after that made the press, he is yet to deny it. Then the next day, the minister of petroleum resources, Ibe Kachikwu, said the President is working and having meetings in London and then worst of all, Garba Shehu says (and I quote) “Nigerians are happy with Buhari and would still vote for him”.
Sometimes I wonder if these APC people realise that they should have stopped lying after they won the elections. Propaganda can win elections but only proper agenda can govern a country!
And then there was the coup warning by the Chief of Army staff, Lt. Gen Tukur Buratai, who warned the nation that unnamed politicians were actively procuring military officials for unpatriotic purposes.
Let me be very, very clear and unambiguous. I am against any coup and will rise against it, but is it not ironic that the government of Muhammadu Buhari, a man who staged a coup against a democratically elected President Shagari today warns against coups?
Some shallow people say Buhari did not plan the coup and he only benefitted from it. To those who are shallow enough to believe that, I bet you also believe that President Buhari is taking made-in-Nigeria medication in London!
Can you imagine where Nigeria would have been if an over-ambitious Buhari had not toppled a government he swore by the constitution to defend? Under Shagari, the Naira was 50 kobo to a dollar. You could actually step out of a plane at London’s Heathrow or New York’s JFK airports and convert the Naira to the pound and dollar because the Naira under Shagari was a fully convertible currency globally. Electric power was almost constant and NEPA would announce before any power outage. Nigeria Airways and Nigeria National Shipping Line were thriving. The Federal Government NEVER owed salary for even one day. Yet Buhari toppled that government and said Shagari was bad.
Today, Buhari’s administration is by far WORSE than Shagari’s government in terms of performance. If you are one of those children who were deceived by the APC’s lies, go and ask your parents if I am lying in my testimony of the Shagari administration. I was five when Shagari became President and nine when he was toppled and I experienced everything I mentioned above. At age 9, my parents (civil servants) could afford to send me on yearly foreign vacations under Shagari. Don’t you dare believe the lies about his administration. Shagari is a decent man who did not loot!
The bitter truth is that if President Muhammadu Buhari submits his certificate and his resume for a job as a bank manager in say the U.K. or the US, he will not qualify for the job! What success has he achieved in his private business? How can a man who cannot generate wealth for himself in his private business be expected to generate wealth for a nation? It is not just possible!
If you think I am being overly critical, then ask yourself why the economy and the value of the Naira picks up when Buhari is in London and tanks when he returns to Nigeria! Why does the Nigerian Stock Exchange contract when President Buhari surfaces and expands when he absconds to London? These are historical facts that cannot be explained away by the usual blame it all on Jonathan excuse!
After two years in office, the most successful achievement of the Buhari administration is the President’s departure to London for whatever reason. One can only hope that his presence in London does not also tank the British economy!
But there is one thing I commend Buhari for (although it is Asiwaju Bola Tinubu I should perhaps be thanking). His choice of a deputy in the person of Vice President Yemi Osinbajo is “a breath of fresh air” (to borrow the words Tolu Ogunlesi, my successor in the Buhari administration, used to describe then President Jonathan).
With Osinbajo, there is hope for Nigeria. I was touched when as acting President (not coordinator as Buhari would have him be) he personally attended the #Biafraat50 event that held on Thursday, May 25, 2017 in Abuja. For one, President Muhammadu Buhari would NEVER have attended such a function. But by attending the event, the acting President has applied a healing balm and a soothing salve on the injured feelings of pro-Biafra agitators. Without firing a bullet and using brute force, as President Buhari has been doing, he has done more to make those who self identify as Biafrans feel wanted by Nigeria.
What a man, what a great man. If only he had a boss that was deserving of him!

Reno’s Nuggets:
Guys, stop trying to impress girls with your looks or your charms. Just succeed. When you have money, there will be more than enough girls to call you honey. Nothing makes a man as attractive as success. But choose which one you will marry with wisdom. When satan wants to finish a man he brings him a bad girlfriend. If he wants to destroy him irreparably he convinces him to promote her to wife. So put your trust in God when choosing a wife. If you keep putting your trust in people, they will keep disappointing you until you learn that only God can appoint you #RenosNuggets.