Gender-based Violence: Why Children Must be Protected from Abuse

Funmi Ogundare writes on the need for more awareness and engagements with organisations and groups that work with children so that girls who have suffered one form of physical, sexual or emotional abuse can get justice

Rashida Adeola, 16, dropped out of Oluwa Memorial College, Tolu, Ajegunle, in 2019 when she was in JS2 because there was no money to finance her education. She grew up not knowing her father and mother, who was supposed to be taking care of her, eloped with another man and abandoned Rashida and three of her siblings that she had for two other men, to their fate.

At the peak of the COVID-19 pandemic in 2020, she got pregnant for a boy, an apprentice mechanic she met while hawking ‘pure’ water on the street. When she broke the news to the boy, he denied responsibility for the pregnancy.

THISDAY recently met Rashida at the office of Dreams from the Slum, an Ajegunle-based non-governmental organisation that takes children off the street. She was clutching a malnourished two-month-old baby. She looked forlorn and unsure of what the future holds. She recalled that when the boy approached her for friendship, she accepted his request, and they started having sex afterwards until she got pregnant. When she informed him about the pregnancy, he denied being responsible for it.

“All through the period of my pregnancy, I couldn’t stay at my mother’s place because she hardly had time for my siblings and me who she had for other men, and so I was forced to stay at a crowded room in Ajegunle which we pay stipends for, to pass the night.

“Once my mother goes out on Monday, she will not come back until the Sunday after and there is no one to cater for my upkeep, so I had to start the business of hawking sachets of water which I learnt from my mother so that I could use the proceeds to feed myself.”

She said since she had her baby through the Caesarian section two months ago, she had to stop hawking. Asked how she caters for herself and her baby, she said she met the organisation’s founder through a relative of hers, adding that he has been responsible for their cloths, toiletries and food for her and her baby. Rashida’s case illustrates many teenage girls’ from dysfunctional homes have been abused, especially during the COVID-19 period, due to lack of parental care, self-control, assault, lack of sex education, poverty, among others.

Findings from the 2014 National Survey on violence against children reveal that six out of every 10 children in Nigeria have suffered one form of physical, sexual or emotional abuse before they reach the age of 18. One in four girls and one in 10 boys have experienced sexual violence. This violence often occurs in a place where the child is considered safe such as their homes and schools, and fewer than five per cent of children who are victims of abuse ever get the help they needed to recover. Obiamaka Aga is a legal practitioner and secretary of the African Women Lawyers Association, Lagos. The association is also a member of the Child Protection Network (CPN) in the state. She said the group works directly with children.

She recalled a case of a couple arrested for neglecting their three children who were between the ages of three and five, adding that the group investigated the issue and found them culpable.

“This couple were drunks and take Indian hemp on a daily basis, and the children loiter from one street to another. We received information from a mandatory reporter because there is a child rights law that has been put in place by the Lagos state government,” she stated. “We also have the child protection policy, which stipulates that you must report anything bad if you see anything bad happening to a child. So we monitored it, and we saw that it was a pattern, and we picked up the parents. Right now, the children are being rehabilitated in a home, while the parents are in Kirikiri Correctional Centre, Lagos, cooling their heels.”

Aga said the group also go down to schools to educate children about their body parts while expressing concern most parents have failed in their responsibility.

“They are not talking to their children, and they don’t even know what child rights are. We go directly to the children beginning from nursery school. By going through the school system, it is already making the needed impact. The children are the ones speaking up on the issue of abuse, not even the parents. For instance, there were three sisters that we rescued. Their father was molesting them sexually.

“These sisters reported to their neighbour, family members and even their church, but they were told they needed deliverance. The eldest was about 15 years old. After that, they reported the case to the school, and because they had the opportunity to hear about sex and abuses, they knew that what their father was doing to them was completely wrong.”

There is also the culture of silence, especially from the mothers who often try to cover up for the fathers who perpetrate this abuse because they are the breadwinners of the home. Emphasising the culture of silence from family members, she said, “Each time we get to the police station, they tell us that they can manage it, especially if the person molesting the children is their breadwinner.”

A legal aid officer with the Legal Aid Council of Nigeria and former chairperson of Federation of Women Lawyers in Taraba, Jessica Jidanke Offia, noted that sexual and gender-based violence, particularly in the north, is hardly discussed.

“Affiliations are also very vocal about women rights regarding sexual and gender-based violence. The awareness is getting better now, but we still have cultural and religious inhibition and the general attitude towards sexual relations. Recently, with more awareness and engagement with people and advocacy, we are beginning to see people speak out.”

She recalled a case of a father who was abusing his daughter because her mother had died, saying, “he feels that the girl belongs to him,” and he could do whatever pleases him with her. The girl was already 12 when the abuse was uncovered.

She added, “We are saying that the time has come to break that silence. We can’t afford that anymore because sex and sexual-based violence are such a phenomenon that affects society. You see people behaving abnormally these days, and when you go to the roots of it, it’s actually sexual and gender-based violence. It shouldn’t be handled like a family matter. People should speak out more, especially now that we see more support from the government and groups, civil society organisations and NGOs, and their willingness to take up this issue and handle it headlong rather than allow it to be swept under the carpet.”

According to Offia, domestic violence drives some children to the street. The duo of Uju Chukwumoka and Cynthia Ibe of FIDA said the impact of the COVID-19 pandemic has escalated domestic violence, adding that the group has magnanimously started to cushion so many of the impacts and victims are getting justice. For girls who have been molested sexually and got pregnant in the process, they said once they can identify the culprit, they will be mandated to take care of the baby. The duo said the group has been working with the Lagos government to give a holistic approach to victims, adding that they have also been promoting women’s rights.

Isaac Omoyele, the founder of Dreams from the Slum, told THISDAY how his organisation partner the Rights Enforcement and Public Law Centre to help victims of abuse by advocating for their rights and providing free legal services for vulnerable women. “This is the reason why we partnered with them so they could sensitise girls and women in Ajegunle on their rights.”

For abused teenage girls, he said he believes that everyone has a chance to rewrite the outcome of their lives. This is why his organisation is making moves to connect them with organisations and individuals that can come to their aid.

Describing Rashida’s case as pathetic, he said the person that impregnated her is a boy. “It is not advisable for her to go back to him. Her child is totally malnourished. As an organisation, we have actually taken it as a duty for us to take care of everything that the child needs, like clothing, food and nappies,” said Omoyele. “We might not be able to shelter her for now. Another thing is to see how we can set girls like her up in business so that they will be able to help themselves.”