I Am Open to a New Marriage as Long as it Brings Joy, Fulfillment

Damilola Adegbite

Whenever you talk about award-winning television series, Tinsel, actress Damilola Adegbite pops up. She rarely graces the screens, but regarded as one of the few young talents in the industry. Today, she is reinventing herself quietly, growing her list of achievements and ready to unveil the next chapter of her life in her new book titled ‘Reset’. Ferdinand Ekechukwu writes

Actress and Television personality, Damilola Adegbite is gradually coming out again. She’s opening up about her past, present and future. In the last couple of weeks, the most wanted Tinsel star has graced a couple of shows online and on television where she opened up on her absence. “I’m here today because I trust you, you know… Ordinarily I don’t need to say anything to anybody except I want to. And I want to with you,” Adegbite said grinning.

It’s been over three years since she went hibernating, following her botched marriage to her on-screen love interest and Ghanaian hunk, Chris Attoh, whom they both have a male child. Beset by her matrimonial misfortune, Adegbite had closely kept mum despite getting interview prods. Her mood at the time was averse to any sort of media spotlight which she says was causing her more harm than good. She needed to strike a healthy balance.

If love was all that matters, her marriage would have thrived. “My marriage didn’t work but I learnt a massive lesson from that experience and it is that love is not enough… the only regard I have for him now is that he is the father of my son, I don’t regret anything.” Recently in an exclusive chat with this reporter, Adegbite, responded on her absence in the industry and on giving marriage another chance going by her experience and all from it. “Hibernation would not be the right word to use in my case”, she said.

“I would say I have been “settling into my new realities” and rediscovering my true self. As regards getting married again, I am open to new possibilities in my future, as long as it brings me joy, fulfillment, and peace.” Moving on with her life, the award-winning actress is charting a new course, breaking new ground and shaking things up in the creative space with poise, easy grace and tunnel vision.

Today she is reinventing herself, quietly growing her list of achievements and ready to unveil the next chapter of her life in her upcoming book. The new author, Adegbite will launch her book this November, titled: “Reset: The Mind-Body Approach to a New You”.

The six chapter book is a self-help, wholeness, and wellness manual for anyone who feels like they have been or are still being knocked down by life, and needs motivation and guidance on how to get back up or stay up. “I share many of my experiences and how I have greatly benefitted from the practices I talk about in the book”, Adegbite revealed, adding that: “My career and previous marriage have been huge turning points in my life. So yes, I do talk about them in my book.”

On the inspiration behind the book, she said: “It all started at the beginning of the COVID pandemic. I was spending a lot of time talking to family and friends. Friends I hadn’t spoken with in years were reaching out to check on me and vice versa, and for some reason, quite a number of them were opening up to me about their deepest and darkest struggles.

“To encourage them, I also shared some of my experiences and the ways that I have kept my mind and body strong enough over the years. I was surprised at the positive feedback I was getting from them after they had imbibed some of these habits, and their responses also kept me happy and motivated. Indeed we rise by lifting others.

“After the lockdown, I spoke to a friend about my intentions of handing out little motivational pamphlets and free home exercise E-books, on how to get our minds and bodies in better shape, as my little contribution to humanity, and she said to me, ‘Stop being modest. You know more than enough about fitness and wellness to write a full book!’ And here we are today.”

Back to her acting exploit, Adegbite may not be a regular on screen during her active moments, but the thespian is regarded as one of the few talents in the industry. However, working with prominent entertainment stars like OC Ukeje, Beverly Naya, Desmond Elliot, to mention a few, in 2015 was a year that revealed a deeper side to the actress when she starred in the Nigerian psychological drama film, ‘Heaven’s Hell’.

From then on, her brilliance translated into a myriad of challenging silver screen projects which she took on with as much gusto as possible, revealing parts of her that were beautiful to see. A good number of other feature films and television series, including blockbuster movies like ‘6 Days to Christmas’, ‘Merry Men’, ‘Banana Island Ghost’, and ‘The Arbitrator’, followed, and further upped her acting status. She would also appear in critically acclaimed movies like ‘From Lagos with Love’, ‘Coming from Insanity’, among other feature films.

Known for her captivating screen presence, Adgebite featured in the brilliant TV series “Before 30” and has starred in stage plays such as ‘The Vagina Monologues’, ‘Iya Ile’ and ‘Wedding Blues’. Her role in the widely acclaimed movie, “Flower Girl”, in 2011, won Best Actress in a TV Series at the Nigeria Entertainment Awards. To the chic, her appearance on Tinsel remains one of her most amazing life (changing) experience.

Fresh out of school from Bowen University, Damilola hadn’t had much experience of the acting world. All she had was dream, like most newbies venturing into the movie industry. “Because it happened at a time when I was fresh out of school and I was expecting humble beginnings; I was expecting the hustle (laughs) that you are out of school and you must start small. I was actually on another set out of Lagos. And it was a much smaller production when they called me to come for the audition. And I got there (Tinsel set) I couldn’t believe the magnitude of what I was getting on as my first job.

“I was earning a lot monthly, I was balling! Monthly! And other bills were being taken care of you know… And I made some amazing life memories, some amazing friends. It just showed me that you don’t necessarily have to struggle. Honestly. I mean I understand, you know, to do not despise the days of small beginnings but aim higher every time, it may just be possible. So let’s not have the mentality of ‘oh I have to start small’ no, not all the time…” Adegbite recounts in an earlier interview.

Soon after that stroke of luck which marked her entry in 2006, Adegbite promptly shot to fame. But she wanted to have a feel of different roles. She was becoming uncomfortable being stereotyped which she believes minimized her acting potential. She felt boxed up in romantic roles. This forced her initial retreat from the industry years after her award-winning acting debut as Thelema Duke in M-net’s acclaimed longest television series, ‘Tinsel’, where she stole hearts.