Bishop Peace Okonkwo: Vibrant at 70

The wife of Dr. Mike Okonkwo, the Presiding Bishop of The Redeemed Evangelical Mission, TREM, Bishop Peace Okonkwo, is a woman whose life has impacted countless lives. Saddled with a burden to alleviate the sufferings of humanity, particularly women, she is constantly ministering to them and affecting their lives. As she clocks 70 today, the philanthropist and Resident Pastor of TREM reflects on her life journey and what has kept her strong and vibrant for the last seven decades, in this interview with MARY NNAH 

What does June 10th signify in your life?

June 10 means so much to me. It was the day I was born. It is a special day. Growing up, I know that June 10 is my birthday. It is 70 years on the face of the earth. 70 years!

But you don’t look 70.

Everyone says so. I say that apart from the few things I do, it is the grace of God. God has given me that grace. I eat right and I do some walking exercise. Not much. I just walk around my compound. That’s all.

What were your childhood fantasies while growing up? 

My daddy died when we were very small. It was my grandmother that brought us up. It wasn’t so wonderful but we waded through it. My grandmother sent us to school, and God helped us. Look at where we are today and my grandmother is no more.

And then while growing up we just look up to God. My grandma on Sunday evening after service will ensure we read the bible. I can’t say I wanted to be a doctor or a lawyer, No. we just followed God as he leads us.

It is like you were prepared by your grandmother from childhood to be a pastor?

So to speak, she taught us the bible the much she knew and we tried to live by it. At that time, we just wanted to live and please God. She will tell us everything we are seeing here it is God that made it possible. So, we pray to God and thank Him for making it possible.

But then, I didn’t know I was going to be a pastor. When the bishop came to marry me he was not a pastor. I just like to work behind the scene. I like to pray, and help people. The pastorate just came. God had a plan for me which, I can see now.  The way he took me he was working it out. I just married him (bishop) and the rest started to unfold. Even the day my husband made me a bishop, I cried my eyes out because I knew I didn’t know much then. I said for what? 

All I wanted was to serve God. He said God told him. Thank God he didn’t tell me at home, if he did, I wouldn’t have gone to church that day. At that time, I didn’t feel I was ready for it. He just came that day and said, the Lord told him to make some people pastors and bishops. When he called my name I almost fainted. Tears were rolling down my eyes. Did you say bishop? I’m trying to handle pastorate already. I just gave in and started trusting God. He helps me a lot, with words and prayers. He told me that God told him so. I just followed what God said. 

At what point in life was your husband when you met him?

He wasn’t a pastor when I met him. He was working in the bank then. I knew his family. My grandmother at that time was in the same church as them. I knew Mama Iloh (his senior sister), particularly. After the war, everybody was looking for God. So, we went to the same church, UCC. I love listening to music and also I love to dance. I just went there to listen to the music and uplift my spirit.  That was where I met him, in the youth fellowship.

Bishop had an air. When he’s coming, he’s always flinging his father’s car key. But he’s a pleasant person. He’s very shy. He couldn’t talk to me; he went to talk to the senior sister that he liked me. The rest is history.

Has the bishop annoyed you before?

We are husband and wife. We always have some issues to talk about but one thing is that I don’t allow it to go down. The way we live; I will tell him, my friend, this thing you did, I don’t like it. He would try and explain it to me. Marriage means understanding.  

Bishop is the simplest person you can deal with. He is very simple. I’m the hard one. Don’t look at his hard face. He’s very soft in the heart. If you look at the face you will be deceived.

What was life like before the ministry?

Life was rough. When we were young, grandma doesn’t believe in grinding, you will beat it. You know how difficult it is to beat dry pepper. And we trekked to school. We didn’t have a car. St. Berths to Uwani in Enugu, we trekked it. When we returned from school, grandma has not cooked. The egusi is there to peel. You will do it or else you won’t eat. Life was rough. Even when I came into the ministry, it wasn’t that rosy. I drank gari without sugar and milk. But look at it today, If I don’t want to eat, I don’t want to eat because of weight. Processing time is not an overnight thing. You just have to trust and believe God. It was tough. 

I remembered when I started working, I was married at that time, and I have gone into molue. A young boy was struggling to come inside the molue and I offered he sat on my lap not knowing the young boy was targeting my purse. He took my purse and by the time I got down, I didn’t see my keys. It wasn’t easy at all. People that look at us and say I want to be like Bishop Peace, get ready, you will pass through the mill but if you are ready to put your eyes on Jesus, you will do more than I am today.

Let’s look at the good and the bad side of life.

The good side is when I married the bishop. When I had my first child is another good side.  The bad side was when my first daughter died and when we lost the bishop’s brother (the doctor), it was bad. One thing we have to do in life is to look up to Jesus. If he allows it why can we question Him? Our lives are in His hands. Everything that comes to me passes through Jesus. If Jesus allows it, I allow it. I keep on serving.  

When I lost my first daughter, it was terrible; women came from the church to sit around me. I told them, let’s go to church. The young girl is dead and she’s been buried. The women were like what is wrong with this woman, is she off? I didn’t know I was ministering to somebody there – one of our pastors’ wives when her only brother died, remembered what I said. And that kept her going.

How did you do it that your only daughter is in the ministry and well behaved?

When I lost my first child and I didn’t have another child till about four years, I made a commitment to God that if He gave me another child, I will give her to Him. So, when she was growing up, living like a normal child, I didn’t tell her anything. I still remember what I told God and God is a covenant keeper. As she started growing, I was following her with my prayers.  I threw her back to God. I didn’t tell her. 

After graduation from Oral Roberts University in Tulsa, Oklahoma, she returned to Nigeria and started working with the Bank of Industry, they were paying her good money, N400, 000 a month but she was not happy. She said: ‘Mummy I’m so sad, whenever I go to work I’m not happy but when I come to church I’m glad’. She said once she will do one year and then resigns and that was what she did. She has been rendering service in the church since then.

Growing up, who influenced you as a person?

I would say, apart from my grandma, my auntie. After I finished primary school, she decided I come to England. She is the one that was behind me, telling me Peace, don’t worry, it would get better.

It’s been 70 years of God’s grace in your life, what lessons have you learned along the line?

Where would I start? Life is full of ups and downs. Good and bad, but you just have to trust God. I have passed through a lot. You just believe God for the best. No matter how bad it is, it would get better.