ABA SAHEED: STRANGER THINGS

Tola Adeniyi shares his weird and entertaining ‘vision’

There is a very popular but unusual English Show series titled Stranger Things. Really strange in conception and rendition, and very frightening, full of suspense but equally entertaining. So it was with the series of things I saw in my vision recently, and I felt I should share them with readers. These were not things seen in a dream and they were not products of clairvoyance or divination. It was like relaxing in a sofa and things start showing up like in a reel of a movie.

The first to appear in my vision was the change of name of what seemed to be the left over of what used to be a country called Nigeria. I saw someone who resembled Dr Muhammad Gumi in a full regalia being turbaned as the Ayatollah of the new country named Islamic Sultanate of Fulasoka. In attendance were members of his Supreme Military Council and Supreme Islamic council. So many strange and ferocious looking soldiers were also in attendance. The soldiers, all sorts, looked like they had been fighting long-drawn Guerilla war.

I saw someone who was chased out of the Government House and was given a bicycle to ride on. The man did not look surprised or perturbed. It appeared in that vision that he was expecting the change.

I saw some presidential candidates. One of them was strapped to his wife’s laps. The wife held a feeding bottle. Another presidential candidate had books, computers and laptops stacked on his head. He had pens and pencils attached to his over-sized coat. He was sweating profusely as he reeled out strange words which sounded like English language. There was another presidential candidate, his name sounded like Kwashiorkor or coconut, or the combination of the two words. He looked like someone lost in the crowd. My vision brought out another presidential candidate who seemed to have lost his bearing. He had ice cream pot on his laps. He was not talking.

One other presidential candidate I saw didn’t know why he was contesting or what office he was running for. He only knew that the country he thought he was living in had been chopped off and a chunk of it was under the control of the Ayatollah.

I remember seeing Mr. Macaroni being chased out of the Palace Elyse’s the French Presidential Lodge. He was followed by his grandmother, sorry, his former teacher who fell in love with him when he was a mere 13-year-old and later became his wife. The woman’s children from previous marriage who were much older than Macaroni carried some boxes on their heads.

I saw a full-blown revolution playing out in Sri Lanka. Many houses belonging to Ministers and Parliamentarians were being burnt down. Several politicians were also burnt alive. It was a gory spectacle.

I saw the Egyptian President Al Sisi. He converted to Christianity and moved to Rome. He told his country men and women that he was fascinated by the Catholic rituals and their fetish figurines. He drove away his wives and swore to the oath of celibacy. He was baptised as Monsignor Sylvester Toro.

Coincidentally, Pope Francis converted to Islam. He said he preferred the heavy turban to the tiny cap which looked like a dot on his head. He relocated to Saudi Arabia with his meagre belongings and changed his name to Sheikh Fareed Al-Qudus. It was a big win for the Royal House of the Saudis.

Putini or Mr. Short Put, in my vision was flying high in the sky. His bald head was shining and he wore his trademark grin. I saw Joe Burden being pulled out of a shithole. Some of the firefighters in the struggle to recue him were arguing among themselves that it was not necessary to save an 80-year-old. ‘’Common’’ I heard one scream ‘’these guys targeted aged people with their biological weapon euphemistically named Covid so as to avoid paying heavy Old Age Pensions.”

I saw the Yorubian people celebrating their hard-earned Sovereignty. They were in their bright colours. Most of the women I saw were very ecstatic. They danced and danced and danced. It was as if they had been infected by a popular dancing politician from the land of Oduduwa.

Mazi Nnamdi Kanu was in full regalia as the leader of his new nation. Elders of the land in their red caps and animal skin fans exchanged banters as gaily attired women danced throughout the city of Arondizuogu. “I told you, you would be free some day. I promised you freedom. I promised you emancipation. I saw you as the people of the rising Sun that can never be put down or put out. This is the new dawn” he croaked. He looked like immortal Mohammed Ali after his victory in the ring.

Back to the international scene, I saw someone who very much looked like the recently disgraced British Prime Minister, the Turkish descendant named Boris Johnson. I didn’t get a clear view of the guy, but I saw that the man was carrying the corpse of a Queen on his refurbished head. I saw a man who looked twice his biological age and a woman by his side who also looked twice her age. It was not clear whether they were relations of the Queen.

I saw pastors in Sierra Leone fighting with another set of pastors. I observed that they were members of Pentecostal Church or Prosperity Church as they call them in Nigeria. I also saw some Islamic clerics with loads of turban on their small heads, made large by unshaven beards. The Islamic clerics were laughing at the pastors.

All manners of images and imaginations kept flashing on my face. I was not sleeping. I was not dreaming. I just kept seeing strange things. I saw well-known faces of Ministers in Europe and the Americas who were carrying beggar bowls in long queues in front of Food Shelters. I recognized them.

Azenga people were free at last. Ibom people were free also. The long suppressed and enslaved Hausa people recovered their lands and kingdoms in a new Hausa Bokwai federation. I saw the Izons, the people of Kwararafa and other indigenous nations rising out of the ashes of Nigeria, and so many newly branded flags flying high in the sky. The people of Palestine were drumming and dancing.

My eyes were wide open. My brain was at 1000% alert. My mind was entrapped in its journey of vision and seeing stranger things.

POSER 1:

The President, a living President, was not aware that a threat to kidnap him had been trending for almost a week.

POSER 2:

A naked man was recently invited to donate clothes to a bewildered people.

POSER 3.

Whosoever sharpens his sword to kill you, shall slit his own throat with that sword. ASE!

Poser 4.

Very soon, if the run-away Senators and Legislators ever come back, there would be a law banning, wait for it, Dreaming, Thinking, Writing, Talking and even Breathing.

 Otunba Adeniyi, Jagun Oodua Adimula ll adetolaadeniyi@hotmail.com