Of Money Wives and Wife Laundering
By Olusegun Adeniyi
A recent twitter post by Tunde Onakoya on the ‘Money wife’ tradition in Cross River State communities generated considerable social media interest. But after trending for a few days, those excited by the story seem to have moved on since we live in a nation where, even at the best of times, it is one day, one drama. Today, the issue Onakoya raised has gone the way of similar reports regarding a tradition that dehumanizes women and girls in an attempt to reinforce patriarchy. But this is an issue that we must engage if we are to create a just society.
Earlier this year, in the 8th January edition of The Nation newspaper, Justina Asishana wrote extensively about the odd practice among the Becheve in Cross River State where girls, some as young as four years, “are used as collateral for loans their parents obtained from more illustrious kinsmen.” In the report, Asishana narrated how “the innocent girls are often turned into sex slaves in addition to performing other chores for which they are not paid,” in 17 communities in Obanliku local government area of Cross River State. Even though the bombastic Governor Benedict Ayade is from the area, he is not on record as having done anything to stop this sordid practice that I believe should be a campaign issue for the 2023 general election.
At the invitation of Ify Malo, co-founder/CEO, Clean Tech Hub Nigeria, I attended a programme last week organized by the Abuja-based Heinrich Böll Stiftung, a non-governmental agency affiliated to the ‘Alliance ’90/The Greens’ political party in Germany. ‘Rethinking the role of women in leadership positions’, featured speakers including Sharon Omotosho, a lecturer at the University of Ibadan, Asma’u Joda, executive chair, Centre for Women & Adolescent Empowerment, Ireti Bakare-Yusuf, a radio and television broadcaster, Simi Olusola, a social impact entrepreneur and Peoples Democratic Party (PDP) House of Representatives candidate in Osun State and Cynthia Mbamalu, director of programmes, YIAGA Africa.
According to the convener, feminist leadership conversations need to go beyond putting a few women in leadership position. The core of any intervention must promote gender democracy: “To bridge gaps that have impeded the advancement of feminist leadership on the continent, the creation of a shared understanding of what this entails is essential. The definition and use of the term feminism in African discourse pose several problems for African women. Many of us tend to deny any affiliation to the feminist movement, even though our values promote feminist aspirations. This perhaps stems from the misconceptions that surround feminism that need to be overcome. However, in the end, the ways to tackle issues that affect African women should go beyond discussing labels.”
I enjoyed the session because the conversations were honest and devoid of the grandstanding and anti-intellectualism that usually dominate such engagement, especially on social media. Most speakers defined feminism as gender equality which, quite frankly, should be supported by everyone. It is far more thoughtful than the male disparagement and anti-family agenda peddled with warped ‘menarescum’ ideas. Although Joda, who defined feminism as “equality between the sexes in everything except the process of giving birth while a good father can bring up a healthy baby without breastfeeding,” agreed with others that having women in public office does not necessarily equate to Feminist Leadership, she nonetheless referenced the Prime Minister of New Zealand, Jacinda Arden as an ideal feminist. That for me is instructive because Arden is a mother who also has a male partner.
However, from narratives at the session, it is obvious that we have a long way to go in a country where impediments are cynically placed against women and girls, essentially from cradle to grave. This challenge is particularly evident in the political arena where change is supposed to be instituted. In the Nigerian context, most power spaces are occupied by abusive men. For instance, Olusola shared some of her campaign experiences. On one occasion, she met a ‘big man’ politician in her state to seek support. First, the man was interested in her marital status. After confirming that she was married, he followed up with another question, ‘do you have children?’ Despite feeling violated by such inquisition into her private life, Olusola said she replied to him. And then the man brazenly declared intention to father her first child in a manner that is as reckless as it is utterly disrespectful.
Meanwhile, Mbamalu’s story illustrates the paradox of feminist ideology having percolated through the society without any effect on male attitudes. She narrated how she led a team from her office to the palace of a traditional ruler in Anambra State where she hails from. Because she understands the culture and did not want to offend their sensibility, Mbamalu allowed a male member of her team to speak at the palace. When they shared the kolanut (a significant cultural rite in Igboland) Mbamalu was omitted to the displeasure of her team members who could not understand the discrimination. Apparently having noticed the mild drama, the traditional ruler, whom Mbamalu described as well-educated, referenced the kolanut episode in his remark. “I believe in gender equality”, the traditional ruler reportedly said with deliberate emphasis before he then added the punchline, “But it will never happen in this lifetime!”
Today, the reality of our country is that women and girls are not only discriminated against at every level but are also denied equal treatment on issues that directly impact their well-being. More concerning is the level of its institutionalization, to the point that any kind of political action that might facilitate change is virtually impossible. In September 2018, a watered-down version of the Gender and Equality Bill passed a second reading in the Senate. Provisions included equal rights for women in marriage, divorce, property ownership and inheritance etc. At the end, the bill was voted down because many senators said enacting a law to accord women equal rights with men was “un-African and anti-religious”.
A fundamental ground rule of democracy is fair representation. But the National Bureau of Statistics (NBS) Quarterly Bulletin released on 1st May this year revealed that women still do not have equal access to decision making and power-sharing at any level in the country. According to the report, the statistics of ministerial appointments from 1999 to 2021 stood at 13.73 per cent for females and 86.27 per cent for males while for senatorial seats, females had a representation of 15.91 per cent and 84.09 per cent for males. We all know there has been no elected female president, vice president or governor. And there is not likely to be one in 2023 since the female All Progressives (APC) gubernatorial candidate in Adamawa State has been upended by the court. Even the handful of women who are offered appointive positions, especially in the states, are hardly given responsibilities commensurate with their talents.
While we bemoan this state of affairs, a prominent traditional ruler in the Southwest who has failed repeatedly at serial monogamy (using a cynical method of wife elimination by substitution) has just decided to raise the stakes by engaging in what appears to me like wife laundering. He is marrying multiple professionally successful and beautiful women at the same time with some palace chiefs using the name of a Yoruba god as justification. People of course have a right to their choice. But the merchandising that is going on in the name of marriage by this traditional ruler and the blatant objectification that follows on social media can only reinforce patriarchy that is already ingrained in our society. It is therefore no surprise that at a political gathering, professionally accomplished women were told to stand up and serve puff puff, probably by men below their stations in life. After all, we live in a society where male drivers have been known to rudely tell their female bosses, “I have your type at home.”
On the specific challenge among the Becheve people, the fact that child slavery and sexual exploitation are finding justification in culture reflects social norms that perpetuate discrimination against the female gender in Nigeria. This is the challenge all stakeholders must join to address. In the January report by Asishana, she shared several pathetic stories. One was that of Beatrice Okumo, 35, who was used as collateral for the money her father borrowed when she was five and is now wife to the 85-year-old creditor. Meanwhile, the loan that enslaved her 30 years ago was taken to settle both the hospital bill and cost of her mother’s burial after dying during childbirth. This is a woman whose life was stolen by the men around her.
Yesterday, I spoke with the former First Lady of Cross River State, Onari Duke whom I understand has been involved in the fight to end the culture in a bid to empower the girl child and people of the communities. I asked why she didn’t confront the problem when her husband was governor, and she explained a lack of awareness at the time. “People often forget that I am not originally from Cross River and even then, these practices were a well-kept secret from many because I only got to know about it a little over five years ago. And from that point till now, we have done a lot in putting an end to the barbaric practice despite stiff resistance,” she told me.
According to Mrs Duke who lauded the support of American diplomats in Nigeria on the issue, some of the ‘husbands’ are already being prosecuted after securing freedom for their captive girls. “We have also done a census of all the young girls within these communities as well as their status to ensure a structured and evaluated intervention that can be monitored and measured,” she said, while highlighting programmes instituted to address what she also believes are socio-economic problems. “I have tapped into an UNCTAD (United Nations Conference for Trade and Development) entrepreneurship capacity building programme currently operational in 36 countries and of which I am the Country Director in Nigeria. We are also establishing a honey factory so that we can have an enduring solution to what is slavery combined with child marriage. The idea is to inspire generational change and stability in the region as well as provide scholarships for all under-aged money wives and girls within the communities.”
I commend Mrs Duke and all the people who are working to end this culture that enslaves young girls who are treated as chattels. But the ultimate responsibility lies with the government of Cross River State. For our society to develop and thrive, we must jettison archaic and oppressive practices that circumscribe the rights of our women/girls and prevent them from leading productive lives that contribute to our development.
The ‘Buried’ Naira Notes
In March 2002, THISDAY held a seminar in Abuja on the management of Nigeria’s foreign exchange market. Two days before the seminar, on a Saturday, the Board of Editors held a last meeting that went on for hours. After concluding deliberation, our chairman, Nduka Obaigbena, asked: “Is there anything else we have left out of our planning?” One hand went up. The editor in question said we had made a fundamental error of judgement in the list of invitees to our seminar because we left out the black-market operators otherwise known as ‘Mallams’ who were most critical to the subject under discourse. Almost everyone at the meeting agreed that was a grave omission on our part. But as we were about to re-open debate, another editor interjected, “But we have already invited the Mallams.” Roaring with laughter, he added: “The real Mallams are in the banking hall!”
I first recollected that episode two decades ago in a column, ‘Now that the party is over’ but I could not but reflect on it again following announcement by the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN) governor, Godwin Emefiele that three Naira denominations (N200, N500, and N1000) would be redesigned. “People with illicit money buried under the soil will have a challenge with this but workers, businesses with legitimate incomes will face no difficulties at all,” President Muhammadu Buhari was reported to have said at the weekend to justify his approval of the policy on which the jury is still out.
To be sure, Emefiele was very clear about the rationale for the decision, and it is difficult to fault him. I also don’t share the position that the policy cannot work, afterall some people said the same when the banking consolidation exercise was instituted by Chukwuma Soludo in 2004. But from my findings, the reason for the current free fall of our national currency in the parallel market is because those Naira notes “buried under the soil”, to borrow Buhari’s words, are being exhumed and dumped with forex Mallams in exchange for dollars at any price. Therefore, if this whole idea is to catch thieves, then the real joke may be on the president. I am willing to bet that every available Naira note—whether stashed in overhead or underground tank—will enter bank tills. Yet, if at the end people use the exchange rate of the Naira to measure the success or failure of the policy, there will be a problem. As we have learnt over the years, we live in a country that defies the law of gravity: Whatever goes up does not always come down!
On Davido’s Painful Bereavement
No parent should bury a child, according to Patrick O. Okigbo III, wading in on the death of Davido’s three-year-old son, Ifeanyi and the tragic circumstances under which it happened. “The pain never goes away, and it is worse with avoidable deaths. Such must be Davido’s sorrow at his three-year-old son’s drowning death,” Patrick wrote. While I commiserate with Davido and Chioma as I pray God to comfort them at this most difficult period, Patrick has also raised a public interest issue of how other societies use such tragedies to say, ‘Never again’, after citing a similar incident in 2018 involving a 13-month-old son of another music star, D’Banj. I commend the suggestion by Patrick O. Okigbo III to readers:
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Will Nigerians waste yet another tragedy? There is so much that citizens can do to make a difference. For instance, it was the advocacy of Ralph Nader, a young university student that made cars much safer. Recall that back in the 1950s, cars didn’t have seatbelts, airbags, or antilock brakes. Less than a year after Nader published his 1965 book, ‘Unsafe at Any Speed,’ a reluctant U.S. Congress created the agency that became the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration, with a mission to save lives, prevent injuries and reduce auto crashes.
Swimming pool deaths are of similar concern. A June 2020 U.S. report showed a steady rise in fatal drownings – in children under 15 years – from 379 to 395 deaths between 2015 and 2017. About 71 percent of these incidents occurred in residential locations, such as the child’s home, a family or friend’s house or a neighbour’s residence. Drowning is the most common cause of death for children between one and four years, aside from birth defects. It is also the second leading cause of unintentional injury death for children between one and 14 years, behind motor vehicle accidents.
Nigeria will probably see similar numbers as it transitions from a low to a middle-income country. So, who should solve this problem? As with other socio-economic challenges, one may correctly hang the responsibility around the government’s neck. However, given the government’s well-documented failures, citizen engagement may be a more critical factor for driving development outcomes in Nigeria. It may be the differentiating variable.
The U.S. provides a good example. The drowning death of a 7-year-old Virginia Graeme Baker led to improved safety protocols around swimming pools and spas. Her mother tirelessly lobbied the U.S. Congress until it passed the “Virginia Graeme Baker Pool and Spa Safety Act.” As a result, today, it is unlawful to build a swimming pool in a residential area without a fence, self-closing doors, alarms, and other safety features.
Paraphrasing Paul Romer, a national tragedy (‘crisis’) is a bad thing to waste. Therefore, the loss of Davido’s son should provide the impetus for well-meaning Nigerians to collaborate with civil society partners to get lawmakers to pass such a safety law. No other family should go through similar avoidable pains. May Davido and his family find the grace to carry on. And may the rest of us not waste this tragedy.
Goodnight ‘Aristotle’
Immediately the nurse escorted me to his hospital bed in Kubwa on 14th October and I saw the many gadgets attached to his body, I subconsciously started to sing a hymn. It is a habit that takes the better of me when I confront tough situations. A sharp rebuke from the nurse, “please don’t make noise here” roused me to the consciousness of my environment. But a familiar voice, even though weak, came from the bed to remonstrate with the nurse, “please allow him to sing.” I remembered that encounter last Thursday when news broke that Ariyo-Dare Atoye popularly known as ‘Aristotle’ was no more. A lot has been said and written about his activism in the political field. But my relationship with him was more personal. ‘Aristotle’ attended the same church with me and in our interactions over several years, I found him warm, friendly and very respectful. May God comfort his wife, Biola, their three young children and the entire family he left behind.
