NIGERIA DECIDES: THE HYPOCRITE’S GUIDE TO CHOOSING A CANDIDATE

Is change possible in the next elections? Joshua J. Omojuwa reflects

It is an election quite alright, but don’t you always wonder why others choose differently from you? And when they do, ever wondered the options available to you to convince them to see things the way you do? You genuinely care about the country, you want corruption to end, you believe change is possible, but only if the rest of the country votes your candidate. Let’s say you are Samsu, or maybe not.

Samsu enjoys seeing his candidate shine. He is most excited by the photos from campaign rallies where the crowd appears to be unprecedented, even though the photos have been well managed to avoid an aerial shot – aerial shots are for when your crowd takes up the entirety of the stadium. He puts the size of the crowd to the popularity and integrity of his choice of candidate. Samsu is very quick to share these photos with friends, family members and on social media. What’s better than photo evidence to reflect how immensely popular his candidate is? When his friend shows him photos from other candidates’ campaign reflecting crowds in filled stadiums, he has a logical explanation. These sorts of crowd are because there are no jobs, so people that ought to be at work are out on campaign grounds. According to Samsu, it must also be because the crowds were paid to appear at these rallies. His final argument is that those people are illiterates, they do not know what they want for their country. A massive campaign crowd is great, but only when that crowd is out in support of your candidate. If an even larger crowd turns out for another candidate, you dare not put that down to mobilisation and structure.

Samsu happens to share the same ethnic group with his chosen candidate. In fairness to him, this was not considered when he made his choice. All he considered was charisma, competence, character and capacity. He has not always been a fan of the candidate of course. When the candidate held a previous office, Samsu criticised them for their shoddy projects and even ranked them below their peers. But that was during their candidate’s time in office. The times are different as there is an election to be won. Now, he considers anyone who supports anyone from their ethnic group for the presidency a bigot. As far as Samsu is concerned, to support anyone from your ethnic group for the presidential office makes you a bigot. This concern does not apply to Samsu, because he made his choice based on the candidate’s history of exemplary service and competence.

How can you live abroad and still have the guts to share your thoughts on Nigeria? Samsu believes Nigerians in diaspora should keep their opinions on Nigeria, especially opinions concerning their choice of presidential candidates, to themselves. Samsu’s only exception to this expectation are those who support the same candidate as his. Those are patriotic Nigerians who know what is best for Nigeria. In fact, when it comes to these ones, Samsu is not even conscious that they are not in Nigeria. His consciousness on whether a diasporan Nigerian should care about the elections is only aroused when such a Nigerian has a choice other than the one Samsu’s wisdom and love for Nigeria expects him to choose.

Samsu is dedicated to democracy and democratic values. He intends to stop sending money home to his people if they don’t align with his choice of candidates. He does not understand how they don’t get how democracy works. He was excited to hear his fellow supporters are pursuing the same mission with their dependents. He had a good laugh when he heard that some family members threatened to beat others who dared to say they were not supporting his candidate. How can you say you love this country and still manage to choose a different candidate from the right one? Shocking and unacceptable! People need to learn how democracy works.

The elections are here soon enough. Samsu has done a lot of great work on social media. He has helped to trend several hashtags promoting his candidate, joined a few trends to challenge the other candidates. He does a great job of mobilising members of his political divide to respond to the various online polls on the elections. Samsu does not believe in convincing or begging anyone to vote for his candidate. As far as he is concerned, anyone who does not vote his candidate will only have themselves to blame after the election, when the consequences of their choice come to bite. Others believe that you step out to canvass for votes, nudging and even begging at times to get as many votes as possible to your candidate, Samsu believes in magic, albeit unconsciously. Some of his friends believe he is deluded, but Samsu thinks they are the ones refusing to see things clearly. In his thoughts, ‘how can a country be so poorly governed, yet people need to be begged to vote the right person? How can they not vote wisely?’

Samsu has been taken aback by the paucity of celebrity endorsements for his candidate. He had believed that by this point in the campaign, they would be queuing to endorse his candidate. He is shocked but unbothered that only a few of them have done so. He hasn’t held back insults against the ones that endorsed the other candidates. Why don’t celebrities know how to make the right decisions? He loves the patriots from other ethnic groups who have endorsed his candidate. He is shocked to see his kinsmen endorse other candidates. Samsu knows the people will vote a candidate who hasn’t been part of the rot and has never had a chance to make change happen at the top. They will vote the anti-establishment candidate. They will vote a young candidate who has always fought for the people. Samsu knows what we don’t know.

 Omojuwa is chief strategist Alpha Reach, and author, Digital Wealth Book