You Had Better, Not ‘You Better’…

Ebere Wabara

THE mode of transport does not crash when an accident happens—what crashes is the contraption used. The day air crashes it means Armageddon! Similarly, the road cannot crash except, perhaps, in major war situations when dynamites are used to break up enemy roads. With sea, it is shipwreck, not sea crash or wreck! A train derails, while the tracks (rail lines remain) and cannot crash—they can only get obsolete and become incapacitated. Overall, it is not the scene of a mishap that determines the nature of it, but the physicality of the occurrence which lacks permanence. What do you think about these standpoints of mine? Let us exchange constructive ideas on them via email, not SMS, please.

“Amidst (Amid) succession crisis (crises) rocking the oil-rich….” ‘Amidst’ is strictly literary, old-fashioned.

“The bitter sweet (bittersweet) experience of marrying a soldier”

“…the ‘cat and mouse’ (cat-and-mouse) relationship between wives and their mother-in-laws” New Woman: mothers-in-law

“And the list of victims continue (continues) to swell on a daily basis.”

“The presidential spokesman, speaking on television, said most of the critics do (did) not understand the issues involved….”

“He said such decision (a decision) is (was) not for the President alone….”

“…pointing out that state pardon is to help restore such convicts (ex-convict, you mean?) back in the society.” Sophisticated ignorance: restore such ex-convicts to the society.

“He also dismissed suggestion that the….” Either suggestions or a/the suggestion that…..

“We believe that the workers are right to demand for the payment of minimum wage.”  Yank away ‘for’ in the interest of orderliness.

“The military organize and wrestle (wrest) power by force, and unconstitutionally from elected civilian democratic governments through….”

“Sadly enough, this ugly trend of military democracy is gradually but steadily being accepted in the continent.”  Always: on the continent.

“…there is (are) bound to be problems.”

 “…at the school’s convocation lecture in (on) its premises at the weekend.”

“Besides, it is our belief that the police needs (need) a proper re-orientation along a community line as the case in United States and Israel.”

Vanguard of September 24 fumbled copiously: “…accusations levied (levelled) against ASUU….”

“…a rape of their potentials (potential)….” Again, ‘potential’ is uncountable. Alternatively: potentialities

“Maybe you need the services of competent midwifes (midwives) to effect implementation of the agreement you helped to reach then.”

“…maybe you consider them birds of the same feather with ASUU.” Education today: birds of a feather (not ‘the same feather’)

Finally from the back page of Vanguard under review: “Every human being under the sun has one permanent challenge or the other (or another).”

“While some of life battles may be physical, majority (a majority) of life battles (of others) are psychological.”

The Guardian of September 23 nurtured ungrammaticalities: “According to him, the Federal Government plans to issue between five to (and) 10 years (years’) visas to foreign investors coming into the country.”

Let us keep an appointment with The PUNCH of September 23: “Kwara plans N5bn youth job creation (job-creation) scheme”

From the back page of the above edition comes this salvo: “…President Tinubu’s stance on the strike action by the NLC” Just strike—no need for ‘action’!

“ICPC arrests five over (for) visa scam”

“The emergence of digital communication tools have (has) completely transformed the competitive landscape for companies of all sizes and sectors.” (Full-page advertisement by WSI Digital Marketing)

“NANS block River Niger Bridge in protest” The truth: National Association of Nigerian Students (NANS) blocks… And this: the bit about ‘in protest’ is needless—let the story give the detail. In any case, why would they block the bridge if not in protest?

“Otti assures of equitable distribution of projects” Who did the senator assure?

“Gov reconstitutes Enugu Traditional Rulers (Rulers’) Council” and this, too: “Ebonyi gets 21 days (days’) ultimatum from college staff over tax”

“For years, the Edo House on Victoria Island has been laying (lying) waste.” This mistake is too elementary to appear in a reputable newspaper! 

“Italy (Italian) court bans (bars) Berlusconi from public office for two years” ‘Ban’ presupposes currency in this contextual circumstance (that is, if he was still serving) but ‘bar’ is anticipatory, which means that the former Italian PM cannot hold any public office in the next two years

Now THE NATION ON SUNDAY of October 1: “The presidency, also aware of its interests, may do same (the same).”

“…was in Ota to hold series (a series) of meetings with opinion leaders in the area.”

“…said there is (was) no crisis in the state (state’s) chapter of the party.”

“APGA lose (loses) more members to APC, LP in Anambra”

“This may result to (in) fatigue….”

“Kenya offers 46 oil blocs (blocks) to Nigerian investors”

From The PUNCH we move to THE NATION ON SUNDAY of October 1: “Before the electricity sector can grow, there have to be intense investments into (in) the sector….”

“…her love for the big screen in recent time (times) is soaring.”

“Its (It’s) girls at war on…”

“As many agencies of government and some concerned culture groups device (devise) new (a new) concept of….” ‘Device’ used as a verb is sheer American application!

“They did not even pick (take) their phone (phones) to call….

“…it is very difficult to have coaches that have that (those) skills….”

“So, he said he is (was) going to Lagos but….”

“So, I said, (sic) it is (was) okay.”

Finally from Saturday’s edition of THE NATION: “…if there is a way you can invest that money here in Nigeria, you better (you had better) do so.”

“Edo sensitizes youth on (to) tax”

“It is on the basis of the information that such individual (an individual) would be assessed.”

THE GUARDIAN of September 3 misprinted: “End of road for toy gun (toy-gun) robber…”

From the metro section to another department of The Guardian of October 5 which nurtured two blunders: “Couldn’t they have impeached him rightly or wrongly on ground (grounds) of incapacity for staying away from office for so long?”

“Is it not the problem now, as in the case of late (the late) Umar Musa Yar’Adua….”

Last, but not least, is Daily Independent online edition of September 3 with this infraction: “Break up (Break-up/Breakup) in PDP…”