Musings on Death and Life

Anthony Kila reflects on the issue of life and death among the citizenry especially with the recent demise of Governor Rotimi Akeredolu of Ondo state and former Speaker of the House of Representatives, Hon Ghali Umar Na’Abba.

dear Readers,

Mid this week (on Wednesday 27th of December 2023), we got news that the most certain feature of all animals including the one called man had happened to Rotimi Akerodolu.

A few hours before that news came in, the information we were digesting was about the death of Ghali Na’Abba. Those are the ones that we know in common because they are public figures but privately, I know we have lost many this month this week and this year. On a personal note, I pay tribute to some friends and family that have left us and I pray for their families. In very recent times I have had to console the families of close friends such as Kayode Awolaja, Amelie Blerina, Tanya Evans, Massimo Ranuzzi and just a few days ago Omololu Babarinde.

We do not say it enough and I hence think it is worth restating that the best way to live is to remember that death is certain for all.

A hat that all must wear at some point. Feelings of fear, pain and loss tend to make us miss a point and a paradox that logic makes abundantly clear.

A major paradoxical point of death and life is our penchant to avoid, escape and delay something so natural, so certain, yet we are defined as homo sapiens and we are largely modelled to agree that “to think is to be”.

Many don’t like to be reminded of it but we are mostly Christians who want to make heaven (described as place of afterlife) but yet we don’t want to die.

I always have to pinch myself to keep a straight face when I see leaders and elders who prayed with families that their dear one be kept alive then turn round once the war to death is lost to say “rejoice for he or she has gone to join the assembly of saints…”

Many times, I have wondered if there have been cases in which people feel bad because a patient made it out of comma or a serious illness because the patient or the injured has missed a chance to join the assembly of saints.

The concept and doctrine of reincarnation championed mainly by the Indian religions such as Hinduism, Buddhism, Jainism, and Sikhism (they call it a very fascinating word “Punarjanma”) is not fully convincing either. This idea that one comes and go but with no memory of some sort or the consciousness of the past seems like a wasted journey to me.

Be it for atonement or purification, the rebirthed should know why they are where they are today. Let’s face it, someone missed a trick in the design of the concept and doctrine of reincarnation or Punarjanma.

Imagine how cool it would be if someone that was guilty of something could be reborn to endure the consequence of their action or feel the brunt of the evil they did in their past life, and here is the topping on the cake, in both cases they should be conscious of their past.

Imagine a politician or any public official that looted funds meant for a hospital or school to die then quickly comes back to life and be born into a family where they have no choice but to send their children to bad unfunded school or bad ill-equipped hospital and that politician or public official is now part of that family but with very clear memory of how he or she looted the funds for that hospital in an earlier life.

Imagine a scenario where a known racist or ethnic jingoist dies and is reborn into the race or ethnic group he or she has despised and vilified in a past life knowing very well that he or she despised and vilified his or her present race or ethnic group in a past life.

To each its own, and may be I am too demanding, but the spiritual rationalisation or consolation of death does not convince me. It might not mean a lot to some, there is some solace in those cultures that separate and differentiate the death of the young from that of the old.

In these cultures, the death of the young one is a sad abomination whilst the death of the elderly is perceived as a homegoing to join the ancestors.

In the Yoruba culture, the death of the young is to be grieved in tears and sombreness, food and drinks are not allowed for mourners for there is nothing to eat or drink about when the young dies.

The death of the young as explained by an admired and respected Bard brings about “tears for a sun that has set too early, set before its rays were tempered by the cooling breezes of age, a branch cut down even with the sap of life flowing strongly within it”.

The reverse is however the case for the old that dies among Yoruba people for it is believed the departure of the old is a dance to rest after a life of battles and (hopefully) conquests.

Cheekily, success of an elderly dead is defined strictly and solely by procreation. Everything is fine as long as there are children old enough to send the Yoruba dead with pomp to join his or her ancestors. Custodians of this tradition do not seem to care if the cost of a worthy send-off party (funeral) can start a business or will be funded by debt. Yes, I have my reservations on many of these practices …

For those alive though, above and beyond tradition or faith, what define the bereaved are the irrational shock of the certain, the loss of a dear or useful one, and the imagined fear of not being able to cope with such loss.

Amongst the many (too many) personal losses that I endured this year was that of a known media mogul, politician and philanthropist, one of the many questions I asked myself whilst observing his mourning family and friends was how many will miss him because they loved him and how many will miss him because he was generous and useful to them.

For those alive, legacy and immortality seem to be a common goal that unites all. Amazingly, the means to legacy building and immortality is what separates and differentiate all.

There are those who want to lead a comfortable life and build castles no matter what it takes, there are those who believe a good name is worth more than all the silver and gold of this world. There are those who think with the right amount of gold and silver you can but whatever name you want.

If spiritual and traditional movements do not offer enough rationalisation and solace to deal with life and death, secular thinkers certainly need to do more.

It is not enough to say there is nothing beyond the body, that is too shallow for our hallow human minds.

Join me if you can on twitter @anthonykila to continue these conversations.

-Kila is Institute Director at CIAPS. www.ciaps.org.