Chief (Mrs) Olufunke Arthur-Worrey: Living a Fulfilled Life @ 97

Chief (Mrs) Olufunke Arthur-Worrey, a nonagenarian who recently celebrated her 97th birthday with family and friends at her residence in Victoria Island,  is the widow of Steady Arthur-Worrey, and mother to Fola Arthur-Worrey, a former Solicitor General of Lagos State; Commissioner of Lands, and also Executive Secretary of Lagos State Security Trust Fund. In a recent interview with MARY NNAH, she shared her reminiscences from a long and fulfilling life, crediting God for the good health and energy that she still enjoys.

How do you feel at 97?

First of all, glory be to the God of Israel. I’m so happy I’m alive and I can see the beauty of God among the plants, animals and even in the flies and ants.  I look at them sometimes,  I see the wonder of God who looks after the birds and animals. God Almighty has been wonderful in my life from the womb. I feel well, I feel good, and I can still go about doing my thing. I can go anywhere I like. I can still eat whatever I like. I feel wonderful, I feel as if I’m a special breed. I thank God. This 97 is to thank God with my family.

You are still energetic and sharp, what is the secret?

First of all, the secret is God Almighty, it is not anybody’s doing because when I celebrated my 90th, I said to God, thank you for letting me be 90 because these days when you see a man or woman of 80, they would look so old, how much more of 90, and these days you don’t think you would get to 90 but now I’m 97, I go out, I eat anything, I eat crabs, I eat eba, sometimes when people see me eating,  they would ask me, ‘mummy you still eat meat?’  

Looking at your fingers, they look well polished with multicoloured nail paint. Who does this for you?

Sometimes  I do this myself but I have my children here, sisters, distant cousins, and nephews, they all look after me,  so they do it. Sometimes when they come they will say, ‘Mummy, you must do your nails. I don’t go out to do it.  In those days, we used to go to spas,  I’ve not done that for years. I left  England in 1960, then in England, it was fashionable for you, especially students and young wives, to go to spas.

That means you must be a fashionista when you were young.

That is what people say about me. I love good things. I love local fabric and you know in the market now they have so many beautiful colours. I hope we will encourage them to do more for us by patronizing them. Instead of those expensive ones from China, we should wear our own. We have different ones, we have adire from Abeokuta, aso oke from Ondo and other places. I hope we can keep to that.

What do you miss about your late husband, especially on your 97th birthday?

He was two years older than me, he would have still been doing the same thing, enjoying life. He was a man who could turn everything into fun. In those days we could go to Badagry,  Ijebu- Ode or Ikorodu within an hour we would be there. He reads a lot and he would be telling me things. He read gossip papers, and the Bible, I learnt a lot from him, and we enjoyed ourselves. He was my brother, we just matched, it was God’s doing. When he was hot I would be cold, everybody loved him.

Your husband was from another part of the country. What were the reactions of your family members when you introduced him as your future husband?

I’m a Lagos girl and at that time, Lagos was not as big as it is now, we knew ourselves, and we were so connected. But before he came, we all knew him as the ward of my brother, H.O. Davies, he and his wife left him in England. They were his parents in Lagos, he called them Mum and Pa. Then they used to say, ‘ If Steady was here, he would have done this, he would have done that. Me and my sisters said why don’t you let Steady come, and then he came. And when they were introducing him, we lined up and when it came to my turn, he held my hand and said, ‘Funke, you are going to be my wife.’ I nearly died. I was so embarrassed, you know as a Nigerian girl and said to my sister,  ‘that Steady of yours is very rude. She said Funke don’t worry yourself, in England, they call a spade a spade, even at the bus stop, they can meet you there and you get married.’  Since that day, he would take us to Kingsway,  and buy chocolate for us.  He was just different and eventually, everybody fell in love with him.

The boys in the area didn’t know much about football, he would gather them, and they would be playing football. And then, he left for Kebbi but before he left for Kebbi he had made a mark with the children in the area. He spent six months in Lagos.

When he left that was when I knew something was wrong but I couldn’t understand it, I couldn’t sleep, I was fidgeting, I  was irritable. There was no phone then, he would phone my sister in -law. That was how it started and like a joke, I couldn’t sleep, he felt the same thing, and eventually, he returned to Lagos. But before he returned, he had informed all the family members in Abeokuta that he wanted to marry me. Though at times it could be embarrassing, I too was in love, I could not do anything without him. Eventually, I had to take him to the family in Abeokuta, he too by then had proposed, and they told him to settle everything with the family quietly. We were engaged and he went back. Meanwhile, he had arranged for me to go to school in England. I went to England in 1952, and we got married formally.

What age were you then?

I was about 26 going to 27.

He wasn’t a Yoruba, probably some family members would have been uncomfortable because cross-cultural marriage wasn’t popular then.

He is from Delta. His father is half Warri, half Sapele. It was a tug-of-war here in Lagos before he was accepted. The late Fatai Williams said ‘Funke, with all the people here, where did you get this Isobo?   Funke, you ke,  you can’t do that.’ The father of the current Speaker, Gbajabiamila said, ‘Funke, you can’t do that. No way.’ It was all fun, I didn’t listen to them at the end because I was in love. They all tried to discourage me from marrying him. They felt I was a Lagos girl, why should I marry him? They said Funke you are not going anywhere, anyway, we thank God. God made the right decision for me. I never regret marrying him and being the father of my children. Being my brother, he was good to me.

You must have been madly in love with him. As a young couple, how were you celebrating your Valentine’s Day?

He was more or less like an African British man. When we first met him, he would wake us all up around 5:30 or  6 am and say we should have a cup of tea until we said we couldn’t do that in Nigeria. In the end, he fell for Nigeria, he loved our food more than anything. During Valentine’s Day, he would go to Kingsway or UTC, we did not have all these shops as we have today, but we had Lebanese. shops along Balogun and Martins streets, they were selling all these beautiful things, it could be meat pie, chocolate or something nice, that day I would sit down and he would do the cooking.

Traditionally he was good because he was raised in England, he used to do what was necessary and what was traditional in the English way. He was good.

Let’s about your career.

I attended Methodist School Yaba, and later worked at Bata Shoes, from there, I went to England where I did secretarial study. I also did fashion designing at the Paris Academy in England. You know in England, you have all these facilities

I worked in England in three places as a secretary. Eventually, I came back to Nigeria.

In Nigeria, I worked with Tate and Lye, then an oil company, SO. After working in third place, I got interested in fashion.

When we came back, we were staying at Yaba, the police barracks.  I don’t know what happened, I met the wife of one of them, and they all became my customers,  I made a wrapper for her, I was surprised, and I started sewing for all of them. They were my friends, they were my children and it was wonderful. They were my first customer, and from there everybody started coming. All the people in Sabo Market Yaba used to come to me, and I sewed for them, they were my customers.

Tell us about your fond memories of England.

Well, I got married in England, I had my children in England. My husband was teaching in England at Billericay, he was an assistant principal, so we had to move to Billericay. At that time, there were not many Nigerians at Billericay, there were a few of us in Chelmsford and Billericay, and they were in the same neighbourhood. I was so involved with women’s activities there, I don’t know what happened. Eventually, we had a get-together weekend like this, we would come to your house, and we would enjoy ourselves.  There are so many things in England that I will never forget. People were nice to me, especially Mrs Solanke of WASU. She was like a mother to my husband, and all of them prepared for me in England to be his wife. I arrived in England in February when there was snow, I hated it, but eventually, I fell in love with England.

So many things about my memory of England, everything worked.  Life in England encourages you to learn more, and have more knowledge. Everything was good, in their hospitals, they looked after you and there were so many things you could do to forget about stress, anyway, England was good to me. I was happy there.

Could that be the reason that you got involved in women’s activities in Nigeria like the International Women Society (IWS), women, business groups and others?

I don’t know, but before I went to England, we used to have so many women’s groups such as the Girls Guild, Mrs Sodeinde involved us, we would gather at the Race Course, Onikan here, and she would talk to us about how to look after women. We used to ask them as a mother how they were coping, but then when I got to England, there were so many charitable groups, especially when I got to Billericay and I was involved. We would go, especially during winter and we would look after women with dementia, we would make sure they were comfortable and if there was the need to see their local government people, we would inform the council. When I came back to Lagos in 1960, the late Mrs. Alakija said you have to join us. That is how it started, I have been doing that even till today.

Looking back with hindsight, what would you have done differently as a young girl?

I don’t know. Lagos was not like this. You can’t compare the Lagos of the 60s and 70s with the Lagos of today because now, people are so many but then, the local government was functioning well. I would have loved to see the Lagos of ‘the ’60s and ’70s. I enjoyed my life as a youth in Lagos.

You have just been honoured by the IWS, with a garden named after you,  how does this make you feel?

I feel good, I thank God.

What would you say is the best thing that has happened to you?

God has been good to me all the time. I still cook. I sometimes do my make-up myself. I still go to the market. I don’t go to the hospital. If I’m not feeling fine and I hear hospital, I will become okay.

If you were to compare England and Nigeria, what makes the difference?

I love our culture, I love our people. I pray that our culture does not die.

Nigerians are very accommodating. In England, you have to book an appointment before you visit people. If you visit someone in England without booking an appointment, he could tell you that he doesn’t want to see you because you didn’t book an appointment, in Nigeria, we don’t do that, we are accommodating.