Goodnight Mama

Renowned Nigerian-British actor, filmmaker, Wale Ojo pays tribute to his dearly beloved mother Princess Teresa Otieyeke Ojo (Nee Anao) who passed on recently, aged 85

I have said goodnight Mama many times; many times indeed. However, I never imagined that I would be saying goodnight for the last time to my mother when she called to see how I was doing. Forever caring, forever loving that was our mother. There are three of us, my eldest sister June, my brother Niyi and I was the last born.  

Mama was born Princess Teresa Otieyeke Anao to the Royal family of Ewohimi, in Edo State. She had three sisters and three brothers.  My aunties who were all adorable and so loving were Aunty Maureen, Aunty Dora and Aunty Kyss. Her big brothers were Uncle Richard, Uncle Eguabor and Uncle Christopher.  Her father was the Odionwele of Oghagbo who was highly respected and admired in Opoji. Her mother was our most adorable and caring grandmother, popularly known to everyone as Mama Flamingo was born Christiana Onaiwu.

We all grew up at the delightful Flamingo Hotel which was a regular entertainment spot in Ekpoma, Edo State, owned by my grandmother and was the first hotel to host Victor Uwaifo and his brother. My mother it was who ignited my interest in travelling and seeing other countries.

In 1976 she started a travel and tourism company called Tess Travels and Tours. This company became one of the largest and most successful tourism companies in the country. Tess Travels was the first travel agent to be automated in airline reservations system in Nigeria. Tess Travels was essentially a corporate oriented travel agent that serviced companies like the International Institute of Tropical Agriculture, Nigeria Wire and Cables Ibadan, Exide batteries Ibadan, the American Embassy Lagos, Triplex Glass Ibadan, Ferodo Brake Company Ibadan, Leyland Motors and the University of Ibadan to name just a few.

Mama earned many awards and titles for her hard work and dedication to travel and tourism in Nigeria. She became the first female president of NANTA – National Association of Nigerian Travel Agents from 1993 to 1995, and was bestowed with a Life Time Achievement Award for her services to travel and tourism in  2022.

She attended travel conferences all over the globe as an IATA-approved agent and as Nigeria’s representative. I took advantage of that once by representing her in Cartagena, Colombia, when she could not make it. Other conferences happened in Egypt, United Kingdom to name a few.

To date, my mother is the only Nigerian with a travel and tourism company to open an office inside the United States embassy. Many times people will queue up round Mama’s office block in Tafawa Balewa square under the erroneous impression that she was responsible for issuing American visas.

She promptly reminded them that she was not. She simply facilitated very successfully Nigerian and American tourists visiting the two countries. Mama was responsible for bringing in many tourist groups to tour the sites of Nigeria. She successfully installed a mini stadium at the Emir of Kano’s palace in Kano so foreign guests could enjoy the annual Durbar that took place there. She introduced me to the royalty and history of the Northern empires. I remember being in awe when I entered the palace of the Emir of Kano in  the early 90s. She also introduced me to the Emir of Argungu with whom friendship was formed.

My mother used to organise tourists from far afield as Japan, Russia and the United States. Under the umbrella of Tess Travels and Tours she took them to the waterfalls across Yoruba land, the International Institute of Tropical Agriculture, the Osun Osogbo Festival, the historic town of Badagry and so much more.

Mama was also president of the cycling association and regularly organised cycling marathons across the country. She sponsored many youth groups including the young Footballers Association of Amuwo Odofin. She was responsible for setting up the Ekpoma Okpa Association in London to help residents of Edo state who lived in London.

My mother took me to countries like Hong Kong, Singapore, Spain, Morocco among others. I have very vivid memories of travelling to Las Palmas in Spain and watching the bullfights in all their splendor and ferocity. Later Mama acquired a property in Rocas Del Mar in Marbeya, Spain. I think out of all my siblings I was the one who enjoyed that villa the most.

It was located in splendid Spanish countryside, with a luxury swimming pool and a vibrant nightlife. I would go horse-riding in the day, swim in the evening and enjoy the Spanish nightlife. My friends and I would grill barbecue chicken and sip Spanish margaritas.

Occasionally, my mum would call to make sure I was keeping the villa clean and behaving myself. ‘Yes mum’ I would reply, ‘everything is fine’ while gesturing to my friends to keep their voices down so my mum would not hear that we were having a party.

Later Mama acquired a beautiful four-bedroom mansion in Saltdean, West Sussex in England. I stayed there many times commuting between there and London. Christmas time was spent in a traditional English setting with my elder brother and I sorting out presents under a huge Christmas tree. Mama always made sure the family was together with my brother’s wife Barbara and my niece Adesua joining us from their cottage home in Hove, Brighton. Niyi’s Irish wife Barbara was amazing at cooking Nigerian food as she was taught expertly by Mama. Even Niyi’s friends were so impressed by Barbara’s cooking of Nigerian food. She always proudly told them that she was taught by her mother in law.

Mama was very encouraging of my career choice. She made a bold move in 1995 when I ran afoul of Abacha’s military junta after protesting the hanging of Ken Saro Wiwa and nine Ogoni activists. In the midst of all the fear, confusion and chaos of that troubled time, Mama sponsored myself and a group of eight actors to put on a stage play at the Muson Centre on Lagos Island. The entire group was flown over from the United Kingdom and Mama sponsored the entire production. She even helped to decorate the venue with flowers and so on to create the perfect setting for a stage play. I remember my good friend, Jahman Anikulapo helped to compere the show and introduce the actors. The stage play was titled ‘What the Butler Saw,’ by Joe Orton.

There is not enough space in this short letter to really say all that my mother meant to me. Suffice it  to say that she was indeed my world.  I will always remember how my mother came back from permanent retirement in the United Kingdom and for over five years looked after and cared for our father who was very ill and frail. She was there day and night tending to his every need and showing all the love and care she would muster. Whenever my father and I were alone he would always request that I should keep thanking my mother for all she was doing for him. 

The cruel hand of death dealt a wicked blow on that fateful day of May 23 2024. My mother’s passing made me realise that the dead are not truly dead. They live within and around us. As I escorted my mother’s body to the morgue, I played on my music speaker Ave Maria, which is one of her favourite Catholic Hymns. I could distinctly hear her scolding me as usual and telling me the music was too loud and I sould soften it. I take comfort in the fact that she was there at the premiere of the Breath of Life and also saw me pick up the award for the AMVCA award for BEST Actor.

Always scolding again, she called me in the morning after the award night to exclaim as to how ridiculous my hairstyle was and she didn’t like it. She ended by saying I should never attempt such again.  A day later she was beaming with pride and sent me a Whatsapp message to say so. I felt happy because my mother is my strongest critic…Wale you are speaking too fast… Slow down… Work on your diction… What most people don’t know is that my mother was an amazing actress.

She was an active member of the Ibadan Players which included theatrical luminaries like Tunji Oyelana, Zulu Sofola and Wole Soyinka. Zulu Sofola, one of Africa’s most formidable female writers was my mother’s best friend. The writer of such classical pieces like ‘The Wizard of Law, King Emene- Tragedy of a Rebellion,’ and most famously ‘Wedlock of the Gods.’  When Aunt Zulu would visit my mother, Mama would complain that I am always playing around and drawing caricatures. Aunt Zulu would reprimand her and collect my caricature drawings and tell my Mum…my dear this boy is an artiste!

As a famous poet once said ‘all that lives must die…passing through nature to eternity…mama lived a glorious, successful and fulfilling life. We thank God for her life. She is mother to three children, June, Niyi and Wale, grandmother to six children and great grandmother to nine children.

I take comfort in the following excerpts from a poem by Henry Scott Holland as she is laid to rest on Thursday 11th July, 2024…

Death is nothing at all

Death is nothing at all

I have only slipped away to the next room

I am I and you are you

Whatever we were to each other

That we still are

Life means all that it ever meant.

It is the same that it ever was

There is absolute unbroken continuity

Why should I be out of mind

Because I am out of sight?

I am but waiting for you

For an interval

Somewhere. Very near.

Just around the corner.

To all who have lost their loved ones my deepest condolences. To my mother, rest in eternal peace and joy. Till we meet again. Just around the corner. Goodnight Mama. Love you forever.

Wale Ojo is an award winning actor, filmmaker and critic.