Dissecting the Three Ps of Politics

SIMON KOLAWOLE

Praise the Lord! President Bola Ahmed Tinubu has directed ministers and heads of departments and agencies to reduce the number of vehicles in their convoys to three and their security personnel to a maximum of five. This is to “reduce the cost of governance” (I prefer to call it “government’s running cost” because “governance” is broader and deeper). We don’t know how much this directive will save the treasury in these hard times since the government did not state any monetary value. Before now, Tinubu had announced a reduction in his entourage from 50 to 20 officials on foreign trips and 25 on local trips. We have never counted, so we are not really sure if this is being implemented.

But wait a minute. Many of us did not even know that ministers and agency heads had more than three cars and five security aides in their collection in these hard times. What a revelation. But what on God’s green earth is an agency head doing with three cars and five security aides? There are over 1,000 federal agencies. My math has been pathetic from my secondary school days, but I have just calculated over 4,000 police and over 1,000 DSS officers for agency heads. Wow! So, this is what the new directive means? When we demand the reduction of government’s running cost, is this it? What a wasteful country! We have refused to come to our senses since the oil boom era of the 1970s.

When President Olusegun Obasanjo came up with the monetisation policy in 2003, it was supposed to bring about a major cut in the cost of running government. It was supposed to reduce the financial burden of maintaining political office holders and senior civil servants. Until then, federal government provided residential houses and bought official vehicles for ministers, federal lawmakers and their likes. It was also responsible for maintaining the residences and the vehicles, settling the utility and medical bills, and paying for their aides, cooks, gardeners and drivers. With monetisation, the federal government started paying consolidated sums, prorated per month, as remuneration.

But what did we see? All over Abuja, appointees were still moving in motorcades filled with some of the most exotic and exquisite SUVs money can buy. Some MDAs found a way of accommodating the profligacy in their budgets through what they call “project cars”. Some are still renting houses for ministers and paying for their egos and libidos through all sorts of subheads created to subvert the monetisation policy. Federal legislators are still buying choice SUVs as “project cars” despite monetisation. Everybody in government wants to eat double portion. They are having their cake and eating it. When they become ex-this, ex-that, can they maintain this lifestyle from their sweat?

And this brings me to the topic for today: what I call the three Ps of politics. The first P is “politicking” — the path to political power. The second is “performance” — the purpose of politics. The third is “perks” — the juice of office. Anywhere politics is played in the world, these are three major facets. The details may differ from country to country and from society to society, but politics is essentially alike. Anywhere, you have to politick to win or hold on to political power. Anywhere, you are elected into office presumably for the greater good of the society. Anywhere, you are entitled to certain perks which come with the fact that you are in power. There should be no debate about that.

In politicking, politicians play to win. Some play it clean, some play dirty. In most cases, it is mixed. Politicians undermine each other with propaganda, selling half-truths and absolute lies to voters. They may play up ethnic, religious and other divisive sentiments. But then, when they get into power, the second “p” is expected of them: performance. Socrates, according to Plato in ‘Gorgias’, argued that the goal of politics is to make the citizens “as good as possible to live the best lives”. No matter the divisive electioneering rhetoric, nobody wants a governor, president or lawmaker to leave them worse off. Nobody appoints ministers, commissioners or agency heads hoping that they will fail.

The third “p” is perks. The perquisites of office. This obtains in varying degrees everywhere. By reason of holding certain political positions, you enjoy a number of benefits in addition to your salary. Citizens living in a country where these perks are well defined and minimal and where political office holders are honest and accountable should count themselves lucky. In many developing countries, the perks are fat and unlimited and there is nothing the people can do about that. The ruling class has constituted itself into parasites on the perquisites and never want to let go, even when the treasury is broke and the citizens are eating from the dustbin. They cannot be bothered.

Sadly, while politics has the facets of politicking, performance and perks everywhere, the typical, buccaneering Nigerian public office holder cherry-picks “politicking” and “perks”. It is mostly about personal benefits — eating the national cake. Performance is the unwanted “p” and gets the least attention. I would not mind governors flying in state-of-the-art jets and lawmakers riding Porshe as official vehicles if it is evident that public schools, hospitals and roads are first-class and the citizens are enjoying good governance, with security of lives and property to boot. But in a heavily-indebted country where citizens are in severe pains, I cannot understand what is motivating this profligacy.

Our reality is that many, if not most, Nigerian politicians and political appointees are only interested in the perks of office. Take away those perks and they will feel little. What is life as a government official without plenty security escorts and siren? How would the people know that you are now a tin god? How would you distinguish yourself from ordinary citizens when you don’t ride in a motorcade with police, DSS and NSCDC officers dotting all over you and carrying your files and polishing your shoes and all that? Unfortunately, Nigeria is not rich or prosperous enough to sustain this waste — not with our meagre income and miserable budgets that cannot cater for 200 million citizens.

If you live in the UK with a GDP of about $3 trillion, inflation rate of 1.7 percent, and per capita income of $48,000, you will never see a minister or MP riding in a motorcade and going around with five security aides. But in Nigeria with a GDP of $200 billion, inflation rate of 32.7 percent, and per capita income of $1,621, government officials will be blowing siren all over the place and chasing lesser mortals off the road, ignoring traffic lights and throttling at full speed like Lewis Hamilton. If government officials of any country deserve to live large, it should be where poverty has been conquered and the people enjoy basic social services. It should be a reward for performance.

If really the “greater good of the society” were the priority of politicking in Nigeria, we would not be where we are today. In my book, ‘Fellow Nigerians, It’s All Politics!’, I argued that to the archetypal Nigerian politician, power is an end in itself. Or, put more fittingly, power is a licence to become a deity, to amass and flaunt obscene wealth in the midst of wretched poverty, and to deploy raw state power to oppress or suppress others. To be fair, some politicians still remember to build the odd road, whitewash public schools and sink boreholes here and there. Some, surprisingly, build bridges, drainages and hospitals. But, come off it, we know this is not the most common story in Nigeria.

While I am somewhat pleased that Tinubu has once again announced measures to reduce government’s running cost, the directive on three cars and five security aides does not cut it for me. It is, at best, cosmetic. It serves a good purpose of signalling, but how much are we going to save? We expect something comprehensive. Compare the new directive to the one Tinubu issued on February 26, 2024 that the Oronsaye Report should be “fully” implemented. He announced “the merging, subsuming, scraping and relocation of several agencies of government” in a “very bold move”. Eight months later, we have only created new mega agencies, including four “NDDCs”.

Nevertheless, I implore Tinubu to enforce monetisation to the letter and implement the Oronsaye Report, even if not fully. His message of sacrifice must go farther, starting from him. If there is a Nigerian president who should not care much about personal comfort at the nation’s expense, it should be him. He has told us he was very comfortable before coming to office. In that case, he should set the right tone from the top. He should lead by example in the hope that the governors will follow suit. Profligacy has been so normalised in Nigeria that we think prudence is extraterrestrial. Politics is about the people. Politics is about performance. Tinubu should lead the way. It won’t hurt.

AND FOUR OTHER THINGS…

HONOURING HUMPHREY

Prof Humphrey Nwosu, the man who conducted the June 12, 1993 presidential election, died on Thursday in the US, aged 83. Nwosu, who chaired the National Electoral Commission (NEC, now called INEC with the prefix of “Independent”), was stubbornly announcing the election results in batches before suddenly disappearing from public view as the military government arrested and detained him. Chief MKO Abiola was heading for victory but the election was annulled, plunging Nigeria into a prolonged crisis. Nwosu never showed up in public again until 2008 when he claimed Gen Babangida was not to blame for the annulment. He has died without telling the full story. Sad.  

DAM IT!

The governments of Lagos and Ogun states have asked residents living within the flood path of Oyan Dam to relocate — without offering any help. From time to time, there is a systematic release of excess water from the dam in Ogun state to avoid a collapse, which would be a major disaster — as we saw in Alau, Borno state, recently when dozens died and over 400,000 rendered homeless. The Oyan Dam water release always displaces thousands of people. What I would expect the states to do is to make a temporary plan to relocate those affected, most of whom are low-income earners. I wonder how many of them can afford the costs of relocation in this economy today. Distressing.

PLAYING WITH FIRE

When you hear that 180 people were killed in a fire disaster while scooping petrol from a fallen tanker in Jigawa state, the logical thought in your head is that this would serve as a natural warning to others. You are wrong. A few days later, a tanker fell in Akamkpa, Cross River state, and people did not hesitate to swoop and scoop (luckily, there was no fire). After the Jigawa incident, I had posted in a WhatsApp group that it would not be the last, that we never learn any lessons in Nigeria. When the Cross River incident happened, I posted the news link in the same WhatsApp group and said: “We discussed this last week.” A friend replied, cynically: “We also discussed it next week.” Troubling.

NO COMMENT

President Tinubu reshuffled his cabinet on Wednesday as if he didn’t. Okay, the comedian (or is it comedienne) in charge of women affairs has been “discharged”. She should start a career in skit making on Instagram. Well, the minister of education — who appeared to think all the problems in Nigeria revolve around the age students take university entrance exams — has also been discharged to the relief of millions who would have been stuck at home for two years because of someone’s brainwave. We can now hope his successor will get his priorities right. Otherwise, there is nothing earth-shaking in the reshuffle as widely anticipated. Except there is more to follow. Wonderful.