Keep the Faith, Ali Ndume

It takes a whole lot of courage to remain a man in these times. Our men have all turned to yellow cowards or are all busy licking the stew from the national pot that they have lost their consciousness.

Whatever is driving Ali Ndume, we should all put him in our prayers because he seems to be the only one standing tall o.

This his talk about lopsided appointments is not so true and expectedly, Uncle Bayo taking a brief break from cleaning his dentures have fired back by asking if Ali has not seen two people from his village in the new improved NNPCL — don’t even know what they call themselves anymore — board and management.

I have seen a chat that shows that whereas Buhari had 36 appointments in the North and four from the South, Tinubu has notched 23 from the North and 17 from the south.

The issue is the voracious clustering of the Yoruba around strategic areas like economy, defense and policing and other areas that are considered “juicy” while leaving the rest for the remaining of us. That is the wahala and what is keeping Ali Ndume and the rest of us awake at night.

My people, the Yorubas are today Nigeria’s super race. Apart from the owambe, jollof rice and Iyabo Ojo that they have given us, they are the only ones who understand the economy, petroleum, IT and all other aspects of our national life. Without the Yorubas, especially the Lagos variant, we will not know how to fuel our cars, sleep with our wives, cook our meals and even breathe. This is why they must be in charge of everything o.

They are the best trained, can speak the best English and are the most sophisticated so we should be very grateful that they have even deemed it fit to come down from their high pedestal to serve us. We are so unappreciative and ungrateful. Do you even think it is easy to take a momentary break from their God-given penchant for the good life and be suffering and sweating as they try to fix the economy and a country that “Fulani” people have destroyed.

Mbok, we should all just shut up and allow the appointments to be 100%. I don’t know why Ali Ndume is crying over a paltry 80% when it should really be a full 100%.

When they finish, they should kuku send “their mummy or  their son” to South Africa to study the Apartheid policy and  kuku impose am here because truly the difference remain small. Kai, I can look for trouble o.

Let us wait, post 2027 will not be funny. That one we would ask Fuji Lord,  KWAM 1, to rewrite the National Anthem that we will all sing in Yoruba. I am ready, shebi I am Duke of Shomolu, I am ready.

Ali Ndume better come and start lessons in the “yorubanisation” of Nigeria, starting from learning how to eat gbegiri, patting big bums to the pulsating sounds of the Fuji music and bleaching your skin while understanding the immense importance of too much pepper in stew.

Someone really needs to come and beat me, I swear. Lol.